Flip DaBird’s Wild Author Interview with Ava Bell

Flip DaBird

Alright or All right or Awmothfuckingright! It’s time to unwind with a glass of erotic wine with another one of our hottest female erotica authors. This time, your great foul-mouthed buddy, Flip DaBird, is here with Ava Bell. She writes about whips and chains and dungeons and thangs. If you follow her on Facebook, you know she’s one of the funniest chicks in the author world and ain’t afraid to get down and dirty. Here’s her blurb straight from Amazon:

“Ava Bell was born and raised in Oklahoma where she resides with her husband, two children and three dogs. Her debut novel Miles From Home was released in January of 2015. Since her debut novel she has since released a 3 book novella series, The Tabu Series which is erotic/BDSM based.
Ava is currently working on 3 different projects including a collaboration with another published author.

When Ava is not writing, she is a full-time nurse, mother and wife. She enjoys spending time with her family, cooking , traveling and relaxing by the pool with a Margarita.

Ava credits her love of writing to many authors she has followed and admired…Stephen King, Cassia Leo, Colleen Hoover and CJ Roberts to name a few.”

So that’s Ava Bell. Now, let’s see how dirty her mind can really get.

FLIP: So you’ve got a lot of stuff going on in your life, including saving lives and shit at a hospital. I don’t know how you find the time to write. How many books have you written?

Ava: 5, but only 4 are published 

FLIP: I’m assuming you must write Nicholas Sparks kind of shit, right, but maybe with a little bit of graphic sex involved?

Ava: I write Erotica/BDSM 

FLIP: Oh shit. That’s hot. I get the feeling I’ll be adjusting myself again during this interview. So how dark will you go with your writing. Is there anything you won’t write?

Ava: I would never write anything about incest or anything that has to do with harming a child or animal 

FLIP: Perfect. What’s the best thing someone has written in a review of your book?

AVA: That they could feel every emotion the character was feeling 

FLIP: Ohhh and you write erotica and BDSM so people were actually feeling the sex and the whips and the flogging and the pussy pounding and the…oh fuck. Sorry. My mind is totally wandering right now. Yep, just a second, need to adjust. Okay, and the worst thing someone has written in a review?

Ava: That it was too far fetched. 

FLIP: Too far fetched? Seriously? That’s fucked up. It could be worse though. I mean, how would you feel if you went to someone’s house and you saw your book holding up their couch?

Ava: I would be upset at first, but then I would be happy that they bought it and maybe read it. 

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FLIP: Okay, Ava, you’re being too fucking sweet. Cut the crap. I know your freaky side is in there just waiting to pounce. Let’s crank this up a notch. If you had no arms and were extremely horny, what would you use to masturbate?

Ava: My feet, I would find a way!!

FLIP: And there it is! Masturbation with feet. That’s fucking kinky. Hold on, I’m trying to visualize this. Ava…feet…got it. Would you rather watch porn or read erotica?

Ava: Both, it just depends what kind of mood I’m in. 

FLIP: Ohhh boy…okay…peanut butter and jelly? Or tuna?

Ava: Peanut butter and jelly. Smeared in places that could be licked off easily.

FLIP: Wow…shit…um…yeah. Would you rather watch porn on an old VHS tape that kept fixing the tracking at all the good parts? Or read erotica straight from a relative’s diary?

Ava: Ewww, I do not want to know about any of my relatives’ sex lives.

FLIP: At least with the diary you’d have some good blackmail material. I’d be getting a motherfucking Playstation 4 that Christmas! Okay, this next question is a serious one. Don’t laugh. Take this shit seriously, Ava. How would you feel if you were at a roller skating rink and the DJ suddenly put on an audio recording of one of your books? And people skated harder, like it was their motherfucking jam?

Ava: I would probably be excited and skating with them.

FLIP: Ha, I can hear it now, first that skating rink siren wails. You know, that tornado siren kind of thing. Then, cranked up as loud as can be comes the audio version of your book, and this comes straight from your book, “My legs continue to shake when he lays me down on the bed. Every muscle from my waist down aches. But it isn’t the pain that causes my tears, it’s the overwhelming emotional feeling of knowing that he has accepted my submission to him.”

Then someone shouts out, “This is my motherfucking jam! Conga line!”

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FLIP: Okay, enough playing around, Flip. Head in the game. Ava, would you rather be on a nude beach on a cold day with a shriveled dick? Or on a gay beach on a hot day with ass-less swim trunks? Just answer as if you’re a guy!

Ava: Gay beach. 

FLIP: Wow, you were quick on that one. Yelled that shit out, “Gay beach!” Nobody likes shriveled dick. Next question, you’re with a really sexy man. Would you rather find out you’re seriously allergic to latex, after you’ve started fucking with a condom? Or be lactose intolerant and find out his edible panties were made of cheese…right after you went down and they’re about to return the favor?

Ava: I’ve seen what an allergic reaction to latex does and I don’t want that down there in my business so I’d pick the edible underwear made of cheese…yuck!

FLIP: Yes, the joys of being a nurse and seeing all the crazy shit that can happen to the human body. That has to mess with your mind sometimes. Here’s a non body related question. Would you rather get a Halloween bag full of cassette tapes by Color Me Badd? Or a bag full of little poop-scented hand sanitizer bottles?

Ava: Oh hell I love Color Me Bad!! They’re Okie boys! I do remember all the words to “I wanna sex you up.”

FLIP: Now, please answer which of these you like more. Gummy bears or sweet tarts?

Ava: Sweet tarts 

FLIP: Firm chest or a nice ass?

Ava: Nice ass!!

FLIP: Oral sex performed on you with a little teeth involved? Or oral sex and a finger in your butt?

Ava: Can I have both? Okay, what girl doesn’t like for a man to nibble on her clit? But I still want both. 

FLIP: I suddenly have the urge to nibble on a clit. Like I can just pull a bag of those suckers out while watching a movie. Anybody want some clits? Fried crunchy clits. Ha! I need to invent that for the sex shops. Flip DaBird’s Microwavable Fried Crunchy Clits. Geez, keep your mind on the interview, Flip. Keep your mind on the interview.

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FLIP: Which do you hate more? Rats or roaches? 

Ava: Rats!

FLIP: Clowns or porcelain dolls?

Ava: Clowns 

FLIP: Having your period or he has a soft dick at the wrong time?

Ava: Soft dick, you can always fuck in the shower during that time of month. 

FLIP: Just a second, dick’s kinda hard and creeping into my right pant leg. Let me just hold it in place with my waistband. I’m ready. Running out of toilet paper? Or sharting?

Ava: Sharting! 

FLIP: Yep, that answer brought my cock under control. Sharting ain’t erotic at all! Your man sneezing when he’s about to cum, then instantly going soft? Or coughing when he’s about to slide in, then accidentally bumping your rump?

Ava: Bumping my rump! I love a good bump in the rump. 

FLIP: Bumps in the rump can be nice, especially if she grabs hold and aims you right into the rump where it was meant to hit in the first place. Speaking of asses, if you could punch one person in the face, who would it be?

Ava: Kanye West.

FLIP: Ha, great answer! If you could slap one man in the face with your tits, who would it be?

Ava: Hmmm I think Chris Genovese, because he’d enjoy it. 

FLIP: That’s the absolute best answer I’ve ever heard. That hornball would definitely enjoy it. Careful. He might try ta motorboat ya! If you could have one man slap you on the clit with his dick, who would it be?

Ava: John Stamos.

FLIP: Yes, Uncle Jessie with the clit thump. Joey just wouldn’t be able to pull that off. Of all the characters you’ve created, which one is most likely to masturbate while driving down the highway listening to St. Elmos Fire?

Ava: Definitely Markus.

FLIP: Really? That doesn’t seem like a Dom theme song, lol. What would your character (please name him/her) say if a random guy/girl (a sexy one) walked up behind them and slid their hand up the crack of their ass?

Ava: Markus would probably say “A little lower, please.”

FLIP: If you could fuck a character from someone else’s book (even famous authors), who would it be?

Ava: Caleb from CJ Roberts’ Dark Duet.

FLIP: If you could spend the day in a famous person’s body, meaning having sex as them, masturbating as them, eating fish tacos as them…who would it be? And why?

Ava: Margot Robbie, because she’s gorgeous and you know she getting laid by some hot rock star.

FLIP: Oh man. She’s fucking incredibly sexy. My number one draft pick right now. If you woke up tomorrow as a member of the opposite sex, what’s the first thing you would do?

Ava: Pee standing up.

FLIP: Peeing standing up is pretty awesome. You fucking rock, Ava Bell! Everyone loves you and I thank you so much for being a part of this interview. If any other authors would like to participate in this interview, email me at eroticmayberry@gmail.com. And make sure you stalk Ava at the following links. She loves stalkers. Dick pics not so much.

My author page:https://m.facebook.com/authoravabell/?tsid=0.03971366793848574&source=typeahead

GoodReads:http://www.goodreads.com/user/show/35944627-author-ava

Twitter:https://twitter.com/authoravabell

tsu:https://www.tsu.co/Authoravabell14

You can also follow me on Bookbub

https://www.bookbub.com/authors/ava-bell

 

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